the never-ending story...

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/c/a/2005/12/15/MNGADG8GN41.DTL

AND THEY ARE VOTING FOR THAT DARN HR4437 IMMIGRATION ACT TODAY!! ALL OF YOU HISPANIC PEOPLE, I HOPE YOU ALL CALLED YOUR REPRESENTATIVES ALREADY!!
I will spare you my not-so-polite opinion about the turning immgrants (and possibly those who aid them, such as churches and other socially active groups) into criminals... and about trying to pass this act right after --or in the middle of? who knows-- the "war against terrorism."


Ok... I WON'T spare you my opinions. Just heard on the news the act passed. Sounds like the only thing immigrants were able to keep was their children's citizenship. It all makes me so sad... it seems to me that the Senate actually did represent its people accurately. Some polls gave a number as high as 69% in favor of the act. I understand one is to protect one’s country from potential terrorists coming in. But darn it, terrorist tendencies are not genetically or even culturally raised.
And I understand people’s taxes are paying to educate people from other countries. But well, so many Americans think of Latin American countries as poor and uneducated, as being under such dire conditions that they flee from home and into the US.. to paradise. I don’t agree. Yet if someone does agree with this, then it makes no sense to willingly spend so many millions of dollars on African children’s education, on aid to Asian hurricane victims, on Human Right movements in Latin America BUT adamantly express and act on an unwillingness to help those who come close to you... those who might alter your identity or your lifestyle. It is distressing to think the problem of identity is what might be causing this. Does the United States WANT to have a 50% Hispanic population? Does the United States WANT to have a partly Asian, partly African, partly Hindu, partly non-white, non-European descent identity? The usual arguments against immigration (problems related to education, language, and crime, for example) that I have heard seem so pointless and so illogical to me that I can’t help wonder if the great nations of the world still struggle with their self-esteem.
An unrealistically high or low self esteem cannot be beneficial, under any circumstances. Why should a nation raffle out half a million green cards a year? Raffle them… completely randomly…and then make it so terribly hard for highly educated, competent people to even work in the States? Why not work towards a more logical, positive, welcoming (gosh, even if selective) LEGAL immigration process instead of a reactive, negative, disrespectful action against illegal immigration? I don’t understand why a Mathematics college professor must learn how to cook and wash dishes just because he’s Chilean. Or why he has more chances of becoming a resident if he immigrates illegally and manages to stay in the US for 5 yrs than if he had waited the approx. 10 yrs it takes to become a resident legally.

I suppose you don’t resent a blonde joke... unless you’re a blonde. And I guess someone getting the four-eyes nickname isn’t much of a tragedy unless you have myopia. And maybe I should understand that people don’t mind jokes about immigrants or their countries unless you’ve made a four hour line just so that you can have an interview with a rude immigration officer... so that you can prove that each year of school has already been paid for, that you have no need to stay in the States, that you would rather go home. Or Spain, if you must take a plane home. I shouldn’t let another country’s internal problems affect me, but I have friends and family there. I realize the US might have become some people’s complete sense of national identity, even if they have roots somewhere else... And come to think about it, I have to admit that the US has become a part of my own identity. I have roots in the US. My best friend…good grief, most of my friends are from the US… my boyfriend… and then on the other hand there’s also my church, my education, my social life, and to a small degree, even my culture. Eight years in the US... and do I want to stay? In a country where 69% of people are worried that too many immigrants might use too much of the education budget, or bring about disease and crime… Do I want to feed that idea that life in the US is better than life elsewhere? that statistics measure happiness more effectively than experience? If they do, I give. The American dream… the never ending story! So sad… all of this. So terribly sad.

I'm venting BEFORE the voting next time. Maybe I can vote indirectly : )

Ufff… ok. I’ve vented it out…most of it, at least…hehe… I need to go sleep : )

TOO FUNNY...

En La Crónica de Hoy:
El presidente Fox expresó su confianza en todos los ciudadanos del país, y aprovechó para referirse específicamente a Santiago González Osorio, un joven interno del Centro de Tratamiento para Varones, que durante la visita que realizó al lugar, el lunes pasado, hizo con la mano el signo de "cuernos" cuando se tomaron la foto.

Indicó que en Santiago "El Roñas", quien "ayer me puso unos cuernitos, él también es mi amigo y merece toda mi confianza".

"Nadie, absolutamente nadie va a poner ni un pétalo de rosa encima de él (de Santiago)", garantizó, al señalar que por el contrario, ayudará y apoyará a ese joven "si él pone su parte" para que salga cuanto antes de ese centro de rehabilitación.


As for the translation.. a kid, a young intern at a rehabilitation center, gave the President bunny ears during the presidential visit to the Center of Treatment for Men... a scandalous act of lack of respect!! yet the president even joked about it and said he would do all he could, if the kid did his part, to help him out of the rehabiliation center (which is said to be more of a jail than it is a center of treatment.)I just CANT BELIEVE he actually got away with it. Fun stuff.. fun stuff...

HOME

I am home, everybody!And it has been great : )
Nothing new to say, really. We've been moving furniture around, visiting family, having some fun. The kids' break hasn't started yet, so I usually have the morning for myself, which I am enjoying while I can. I've been working on my paperwork, on my room, and on this house (this house does not need a maid, it needs one of those crazy shows to come convince the family to throw away half of my Mom's stuff)... I've been organizing drawers, closets, my kids' "toy corners," etc. and besides furtively throwing stuff (that won't ever be missed) away, I've been having a lot of time to sleep and eat, as would be expected of a girl like me. My family and I went to the movies last night to see Narnia... great movie. Strange effects, at times, but great story-line. I want to read the books now.. all seven. I'm also painting away this week. I went to the plumber store to get a lt of thinner for my oil paints, and despite being 21 years old (it's 18 for us!) I got carded. I got carded! I suppose in a decade or so, it will be nice to be told I look at least 4 yrs younger than I really am. oh well... nice to know they do card.
Happy times... happy times...

Xmas is just around the corner...

Got 4 exams and 2 term papers to look forward to.. yay... but my nephew is on the way, one friend is graduating, another is leaving for McAllen, another one might get married any time soon, and I will be back home by Sunday. I'm really tired, but Xmas is just around the corner : )

Happy Birthday, Michael!

To My Brother

Well... this one started as a message on my A-Psi brother's xanga... and it got so amazingly long that I decided I'd post it on my blog... brother, I hope you don't mind I've stolen your entry's topic... I've made this message public, but not your identity. so those who know, know. and those who dont, wont : )
I think you pose such an important question about society's reaction to homosexuality (and vice versa).. and my boyfriend and I were talking about this last night. I wish people would just stop pointing fingers and start talking about sexuality and relationships... so here I go... let's see where this takes us : ) maybe you can reply from your blog... but in any case, here's my thoughts on that entry of yours... in any case, I am pro gay marriage... and dear, if anyone goes to heaven or hell (and I do believe we're going somewhere), it won't be because of their sexuality.

hey, brother! hope you are feeling better... I think we all feel like that sometimes... hehe.. I go through that stuff a whole lot... but yeah, if you have the strength, then keep going, and everything will eventually fall in place. I know you are a strong person and will be able to go through this one too and come out winning. I think that the thing about friendships is people have to be willing to give and take, and many go into relationships (of all kinds, not just friendships) with the idea of "what can I get from this?" and forget that they too must make an effort... old friends are great, if they really are friends... sometimes new friends are just as great : ) friends choose each other, I think... and it takes some wisdom to do so... gotta be able to see through people and know who they really are... and gotta care about them too.. and you have be willing to loose sometimes... Friendship is a complicated thing... and being in a society with mixed feelings about sexuality only makes it harder for homosexual and bisexual people to feel at home. I think we just have to give people in general some time to sort out their feelings and beliefs... I think the matter of making different sexual choices is just a big of a deal for people who interact with those who make those choices as it is for you and those who actually make them... Especially for people who adhere to a faith, it poses a very difficult question. Do you accept it? Do you tolerate it? What do you do with the passages in the Bible that go against it? good grief, even straight people have to make choices too, and we don't always make the best ones. I've always been curious as to what a Christian gay man thinks about his sexuality and about how he reconciles it with his faith. Many of my Religious Studies professors argue the Scripture is not to be taken as the main foundation for a person's faith. I disagree... but I also disagree that the Scripture is to be taken as an excuse to persecute others. I wonder when the witch-hunt will end. On the other hand, I do think gay people are a little sensitive to the topic, which makes it hard for people to come out and say what they think, for fear of saying something the wrong way and offending someone. I know gay people have many good reasons to be sensitive about the situation, but honest, even if harsh dialoge is the only thing that will get all of this resolved. it is obvious that politics don't quite do the work... I think it's a matter of being understanding of your friends, who are going through a social change, just as they are to be understanding of you. I think we all have that double responsibility of 1) resolving our personal struggle with sexuality while 2) realizing that other people are struggling with it too, and understanding when, in their confusion, they slip and say or do something wrong.

as for the independence matter, well, one gains independence little by little. it's all about school right now, and a house and a car and a better job come afterwards, if you really concentrate in school... I think a little sacrifice and a lot of hard work and concentration will take you a long ways... just give it time... and Im sure that as long as your parents see that you are giving it your best, you won't have to worry about them thinking one way or another... the rest of us, as your parents probably do, couldn't care less if you are independent or not... in any case, most of us aren't independent yet ... and even if we are, we care about you being strong and well... about you striving to be the best that you can... about you being the friend that we are so glad to be able to have.

Patience, brother. Just give it time. with time, society will solve this problem we have, and in time you will be able to have the comfort of a stable life style.. that's what we're all working on, right? ; ) I think we should enjoy this part of our life, even if it is a preparation for all of those thing we are waiting for. every stage has it pros and cons... so enjoy, even if you don't have everything, there are many things that you do have... so have fun, and work hard... and be happy... I say the heck with social injustice. either ignore it or fight it, but be happy. love ya... hope it all gets better...
Un beso,
~Your sis

buenos tiempos ; )

Thanksgiving was great... saw my family and friends, stuffed myself silly... watched movies and even slept in a couple times. Misael is getting taller, Abi looks even prettier with her new haircut... Sarai is even bigger... lol... and I thought it was impossible... Mom and Dad were running around working hard, as usual, but we got to spend a lot of time together still... hehe... we even went shopping : ) and my kids and I put up the xmas tree... and we did "hw" together.. hehe... we even slept together, as big and old as we all are... night-time conversations are the best.. lol... I love my family!
Got to see Val too ... hadn't seen the girl in forever... since the summer? it was nice to see her (and she looks great : ) ! ) and catch up and get our hair done and all that stuff... it was great ; ) I missed her so much. we'll see each other during the xmas break, and then she'll be off to her new job in McAllen (hehe... can't say it, but I think I can spell it...lol... ). Good luck to the crazy girl : )
The downside to the weekend was that Grandma got sick on Monday morning... she is doing great now, but she is still having surgery to prevent it from happening again... Dad and Mom are with her in San Antonio right now, and I think that they are all a lot better now that they know what the problem was and that she's had no complications. please keep her and my Dad in your prayers.
Friends are doing well... Janie is working at a Pizza place now... she sounds happy again ; ) ! I think she's glad to not have all that stress she had.. and she was able to see the kid, and he's doing well. looks like a merry Xmas to me : ) maybe we'll do that dinner thing w/ Akshay and Ashish this weekend, depending on how things go... finals are going to make a knot of nerves out of me... but I'm very glad to be almost done with this whole thing... almost done... almost done.
I need to find out about Yuritza's bf... been thinking about her the whole week...
The Boy had a final this morning... he studied so much for that thing... I'm sure he did well. We had dinner tonight... it was beautiful... I missed him so much!! Being away from him for the break made me realize how hard it's going to be to not see him for an entire month... thank God for internet...
Well... I get to sleep tonight... gotta start on a paper tomorrow... good night everybody..

locuras.... puras locuras con esta familia

Val, si estas leyendo esto, llamame... aunque sea por cobrar. olvide mi celular y no pude llamarte ayer. En fin... tal vez te pueda llamar desde aqui... ahora mismo pregunto. pero bueno, llamame.

La familia Briones esta loca. Es un hecho irrefutable. Ha sido agradable estar en casa, y no hacer nada, y comer a lo barbaro, y hablar del Minino con todo el mundo, y contar las historias mas raras que pude recordar. Hoy pusimos el arbolito, como es debido, al dia siguiente del dia de accion de gracias. Le ayude a Mama con algo de sus deberes, revisamos examenes, hicimos algunos proyectos... y Dios santisimo, como he comido!! Llegando me dieron discada, y luego pozole, y ayer en casa de mi tia Sandra comimos pavo y jamon y pie, y postre de bomobones y fruta y clar, camote!! me pregunto si tienen camote en Dallas... bueno, y hoy Mama hizo enchiladas para comer y acabamos de cenar lonches de colita de pavo (que rico!!). Mañana voy a cortarme el pelo, a revelar las famosas fotos, y a todo ese rollo... bueno, despues de tener una mañana productiva, claro, porque tengo MUCHO trabajo que hacer. Ya me he organizado y tengo un plan de trabajo (es la unica manera de conseguir hacer algo). En la noche tenemos la piñata de mis primitos, los hijos de mi tio Daniel. Hace ya rato que cumplieron años pero se han esperado hasta este fin de semana para que pudiese estar yo aqui, asi que mi madre les ha comprado unos bonitos regalos. Mi tio Daniel es mi tio preferido... jeje... solo que, porsupuesto, nunca he dicho nada porque tal cosa provocaria drama mundial en la familia Cruz.

El domingo sera dia de Iglesia, y despues de eso es cena en casa de mis abuelos. Ayer mi primo David me dijo que hoy se iria a Orlando a estudiar mecanica, asi que el nos faltara. Pero a excepcion de el, estaremos completos ahora que estoy de vuelta. Mi abuela ha conseguido que mi primo prometa visitar pronto... creo que teme que la familia termine desparpajada por todo el continente... o el mundo entero... Existen los rumores de que manden a mi tio Daniel a Taiwan, asi que mis abuelos estan que brincan cada vez que se menciona ciudad alguna, fuera de la nuestra. Me imagino cual recepcion va a tener la noticia cuando me acepten en la universidad otra vez... mi madre tendra que escuchar a mis abuelos... "Esa niña la mandaste y no va a regresar." La verdad es que tengo sentimientos mixtos hacerca del asunto entero... tal vez tengan razon... soy la primera de la familia en irse... y parece que he puesto ejemplo. Mi prima se caso, y se fue. Y ahora David... y tal vez mi tio... Dios mio, van a matarme... y que si tienen razon?!???? !!! que si en verdad la familia empieza a salirse de la ciudad y las reuniones familiares acaban y la unidad de los Cruz se va por la borda y que si la familia Briones termina tambien repartida por todos lados. recuerdo que cuando mencione que el chico español me habia propuesto matrimonio, la familia entera brinco, aun sabiendo que yo habia dicho que no, que no porque no amaba al chico, proque no le conocia, y porque me parecia una locura... y mi abuela me hubiese matado. simple y sencillo. Mi familia es una locura, tejida de tradiciones e ideas nuevas y extravagantes. en fin... la realidad es que me quedo al menos dos años mas en los EEUU, y me temo que mi familia entera va a dar un suspiro en el cielo. pero en fin, un problema a la vez, un problema a la vez. Si Valeria ha tenido el valor de enfrentar a su madre, he de tenerlo yo para enfrentar a mis abuelos; yo que tengo a mis padres detras de mi, no tengo excusa alguna. no es cierto? sin excusas.
Bueno, espero ver a Val mañana o el domingo... entre una cosa y la otra. de lo contrario, el lunes funcionara. solo espero poderla contactar... la chica es mas escurridiza que el agua, y con el asunto de que ahora vive en el Paso, me es imposible encontrarla. nimodo, pagaremos larga distancia.
para el lunes no hay muchos planes... solo que en la noche tengo que partir de vuelta a Dallas. para el martes tengo dos ensayos y mucha lectura (y olvide el maldito libro!! tendre que leer el lunes en la noche).
Es increible, como tengo dos pequeños mundos, y casi dos identidades. Existe muy poco en comun entre mis dos vidas, y sinembargo ambas las vivo yo, con los mismos valores y las mismas ilusiones y el mismo cariño... A veces pienso que es necesario partirme en dos... pero tal cosa es imposible. lo unico que pasa es que mi vida se vuelve una pequeña locura porque una parte la vivo aqui, en español, con mas tranquilidad pero con muchas mas responsabilidades, y otra la vivo alla, en ingles o en spanglish, con un estres increible, al que no he logrado acostumbrarme, y con menos rsponsabilidades pero mas jaladas...
bueno, ya me despido... Mama necesita la computadora... un beso a todo el mundo... felices fiestas... los veo pronto.

I need to sleep

I’M GOING HOME TOMORROW!


It feels great… almost done… almost done. School has been challenging this semester. Not too intellectually demanding, but exceptionally time consuming. Add to that the fact that I cannot concentrate or get organized. And then the butterfly effect. Forget about physics… this is telephone calls, random assignments, lots of errands, and a multi-dimensional sense of responsibility. One small event at a time, one minute after the other, the day drifts away, never to come back… and the list doesn’t get any shorter… good Lord, no wonder America produces so many businessmen. Had I been brought up here, I’d be a machine… I am afraid I am quite insufferable as it is. lol… craziness…

I am glad I am so busy, though. The craziness keeps me accountable. I stay busy, I get things done, I make sure I know what I need to learn and I make sure things work the way they are supposed to.

And then I go home, and I think. I ponder. I reflect on what I’ve done, on what others around me have done, on what I can learn and what I can reinforce. I go over things over and over again until I either make perfect sense out of them or they make a mess out of me. It is a terrible thing. And yet I cannot help it… and even sadder, I enjoy it. I live a chaotic, yet quite enjoyable life.

---


My family is doing great. Dad’s feeling better… might go to LA to buy more merchandise. Mom is going crazy, the end of her semester also getting near, and has been writing exams and finalizing most of the paperwork. Sarai is doing well, no complications of any kind so far, still pretty sure she will be having a baby boy. Abi and Misi will be going through final exams after Thanksgiving… and so will I. I called Grandma last Sunday… the entire family was there, and it had been my Dad’s turn to cook, so they were having great food… they all sounded like they were having a good time. Some of my uncles might be coming to Dallas for my graduation, which is amazing… I’ve never been visited by my family, other than my parents and my sister, so this is all very exciting.

The boy’s brother is in town : ) Poor thing must be having a blast… sitting around while we are in class… which reminds me… I have class in 6 mins… lol… gotta go…

…that one can wander without being lost

La vida es…
Y hoy, por puro capricho, se nos vistió de seda

Lack of food has made the bears lethargic

You are going to want those options

In Japan, during the winter, we eat this type of cucumbers
ANSWER YOUR TELEPHONE!
Variety is the Spice of Life

The Boy Leaves
Text from Arely: "Did you get home safely?"
Reply from Me: "Not yet baby."
(Keep in mind, we're all in the same room.)
After this incident, there was an attempt to assault me,

as the message was intended for the boy.
~Janie

I dreamt the night had stages… each night had a book for me to complete
You think too much
I am either the most boring or the most fascinating person you have ever met.

Necesitamos que tomes una decisión y nos dejes saber
SLASH don't stab

Extraño las noches de café en el Limoneros
Life is the art of drawing without an eraser

…the mysterious human tendency to record these thoughts and imaginations has become, more than just a simple fascination, a portal into a world of extraordinary, unprecedented ideas –which my own mind would have, of course, on its own never discovered, and with which, for that same reason, my mind can barely start to argue with…
I love you.

"That's more than the Turks are getting."

Scott: Te llamo
mañana,
vale?

Extraño tu voz… nos vemos en diciembre

Que rollo, pollo?

IT’S BEEN A PRODUCTIVE DAY

bueno, pero sólo lo ha dicho una vez

"...ojala que esto pronto suceda,

así podrá descansar mi pena,

hasta la próxima vez.."

todo a pulmón

It's been an odd, odd day

I saw the chicken

I just got a friendly reminder that I should be writing my essay… I said right away, sir… but then again, I am so sleepy that if I don’t do something to wake up I won’t be able to concentrate… hehe… at least that’s my excuse : )

It was Fer’s birthday this Monday. we all went to his gf’s apartment for some cake : ) I think it was a nice surprise… lol… well, sort of… hehe. Fer saw The Boy’s shadow walking infront of the window and knew that it couldn’t be Alek’s roommate : ) … I had so much fun. It had been a while since we had all had the time to hang out (ok, none of us really had the time that night either, but oh well). Minino got to see me in my environment… heard un-heard stories about my personal habits, and I am sure he must have realized how sophisticated and well-mannered my friends are. Various informative conversations on personal health/grooming, linguistics, relationships (gosh, those were my favorite) and of course several highly entertaining stories about Valparaiso’s embarassing past experiences had to come up. Oh… and they kept making fun of the way The Boy drank his root beer (ok, that actually was cute… they assume that he must be some kind of abstemious saint just bc he’s my bf…jiji… I kinda like it). And of course… the chicken.

I have a rubber chicken hanging from my car’s mirror. It isn’t mine. It was my sister’s. he’s my hostage… hehe… stole it from her bc she wouldn’t give it to me. he’s just the size of a real baby chicken, yellow, ugly… ugly as they get. and he waggles when my car is in motion… I think he’s the most hilarious thing on earth. He’s cool like that. well, anyway… I was telling the story to one of my friends, and I was pretty surprised she hadn’t seen the chicken yet. either Janie or The Boy immediately said “I saw the chicken!” We all burst out laughing, and 15 mins of rubber chicken jokes (which I am sad to say I can’t remember any more) followed… my sister's chicken is famous. we’re getting t-shirts, so he'll be world-famous soon… “I saw the chicken.” I’m dead serious. We’re getting chicken t-shirts.

I’m just very glad Fer stopped half-way through his cake-biting ritual so I could splash his face on the cake. (For those of you who might not know, it is our tradition to bite your BD cake after blowing the candles… your friends try to push you, and you try to fool them or bite it as fast as possible so they don’t get you)… in any way… Fer’s old, very old. 22, and my oldest acquaintance here at SMU—met him the VERY minute I stepped out of the taxi that brought Mom and me from the airport. Three and a half years from then, he’s my frat brother, dating my ex-roommate (one of my best friends, whose life I must have ruined by introducing him to her), and he is old as heck… but we still love him. Como dices, Minino? Ah, si. Life is good.

Well... all of this to say: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BRO!!




On another note... I'd like to thank the boy for last night's hot chocolate. Thanks for listening to my little self-examination. I was actually able to sleep a little bc of that. Tonite’s Indian was pretty darn good too! We will have Pollo a la Poblana this weekend, whatever happens! : )

…and now, back to my essay : )

oh! just wanted to say that this blog was written in English, even though I started writing it in Spanish at first… just so that Michael (hehe… hi, you!) and Janie could read it. Jeje… don’t think I didn’t hear you guys complain : )

...and I locked myself out of my room today. hopefully the girls will be back when I get home : )
ok, ok!! lol... he keeps popping up on the screen... yes, yes. back to my essay.

Old friends

I had dinner with Janie and Akshay last night. got me thinking about my group of friends. I have a small, eclectic group of friends… perfect to fit my flowing personality. Janie and Akshay were roommates my sophomore year. Akshay was doing his masters in ME and Janie was a sophomore like me. Marlon, who was a Jamaican dancer doing his masters, was living with them too. It was a bizarre living situation for me… a girl and two guys! So absolutely improper! I am amazed at how much I’ve changed because of the friends I have. I realized, for one thing, that there can be a friendship between a guy and a girl, but absolutely no sexual tension. They were simply three good friends living together, and there was such a welcoming, friendly environment in that apartment that I ended up spending most of my free time (and my study time) there. I was the unofficial fourth roommate. Ah, the good times. We had such a great time making fun of each other, being silly, eating (without a single exception, all my great friends have discovered the mysterious joy of feeding me) having great eye-opening religious conversations… simply spending time together. it was great.

So we had dinner last night. and we were in a completely different setting. Akshay is here only till the 28th, and will soon go off to work.. to God-only knows how many places. Akshay and Marlon have both graduated… so I hadn’t seen Akshay in a very long time… a year?? Marlon is teaching in a university in Jamaica… so he wasn’t there. So Akshay was a different person, a lot skinnier, a little less shy (oh gosh! He was NOT shy at ALL)… Marlon’s dry humor was altogether absent … and the three of us were eating OUT –not in their apartment, not in my A-Psi house, not at SMU—and Janie hasn’t lived near me for a looong time, so we don’t spend as much time together any more (and we’re both in serious relationships) and so everything had changed… but nothing had changed. oh gosh… absolutely nothing. We had a blast, we talked about silly and serious things… we even got a mingled speech from Akshay on greencards and the restrictions of time and work and stress on personal relationships (yes, this was Akshay talking about his personal life!)

… AND JANIE IS GETTING MARRIED!!! GOOD LORD… SHE’S GETTING MARRIED!!!

She said she wouldn’t have a wedding, so I thought that meant she wasn’t gonna get married soon… but no… she is. After graduation… Janie is such an amazing person. she’s managed to live exactly the way she wanted to. She’s the kind of person who doesn’t care what others say. she cares about what’s right and what’s not. Simple enough. She’s the one that took that homeless kid in and took care of him and did all she could, even when it meant sacrificing her so treasured personal security… that’s the kind of person she is. And she’s almost married already… but there’s that traditional part of me that can’t help but think that marriage is a pact, and that even though implicit pacts are beautiful and mysterious, there is strength in the boldness of making the pact explicit, definite… and I think she knows that. that’s why it takes us both so much to say things like “I love you.” such words have much more meaning to us than they might have to other people… they are explicit feelings that we save for the special few… the very few.

And so I think back on my friendships.. the kind of people that I befriend… Philippino, Indian, Jamaican, American, Guatemalean, Mexican-American, Macedionian… gay, bi, straight, inactive… hard-core Xan, non-practicing Christians, Hindu, how was that? Buddhistian? Business, Psychology, ME majors, Education Majors, dancers, Econ, history, languages, philosophy…
What do we all have in common? We love life. And in our own different ways, we love God, and we love our families and our friends, and we all know what we want, even if we don’t know how or when we’re getting there… and we give a damn about what’s going on… my friends all care about school, about their careers, about being better people, about helping others out… we love each other too… lol… even if we don’t always say it. and I am just so happy, thinking of all of this… realizing that I have friends. Great friends.

I am such a fortunate person..

Patoaventuras : )

I talked to Dad this morning… called him like 5 or six times bc his phone kept losing signal. Dad and Mom are in Kansas, visiting friends and raising scholarship money for our kids. They do it every year, but this year’s trip has so far been beyond memorable. The plane they were in went through major disturbances, and both Mom and Dad say they will have a difficult time getting on their plane back to Mexico. Dad said they're happy to be back on safe ground, and I think he's also very happy to see old friends and preach, which he doesn't do on a constant basis anymore. I think he does miss being a pastor, even if he brings out the Church Council every time I ask him.

My sister is doing very well. She has been asked to stop working, and I hope she will eventually give in. We’re worried about her driving to and from, and I wonder how healthy it is for her to both stand and walk for such lengthy periods. I’ll have to find out about that.

Val and I talked on the phone a week or two ago. She is doing well too. Still worried about her family. I’ll see her in November, I hope, when I go back home for thanksgiving. If not, then I’m sure the Xmas holidays will give us enough time to visit. I am amazed at how enjoyable and cultivating our conversations are. She challenges my ideas, makes me consider options I hadn’t even thought of, sees right through me when I try to avoid things... and I have a feeling she does all of this quite effortless too. We are so different and so much alike.

Janie is also doing well. Jeremy, her boyfriend, will start working the night shift, and she has decided to take a year off before starting to teach. It sounds so good… she’ll be taking fun classes and maybe keep working at the library or go to back to UPS. She says she loves it, and I’m sure she does. She’s the kind of girl that enjoy that type of jobs… all I’m worried about is the hours… she had trouble with it last time. We’ll see what happens. Ah! Janie, if you’re reading this, would you email me your xanga web address? My computer crashed, and I don’t know it, so I haven’t been able to keep up with it. The A-Psi boys are in Nationals. I’ve stayed because I wanted to get stuff done, but I do regret not being able to see the northern peeps… and my friend from Laredo called me to see if I was gonna go… it made me a little sad… but it was very nice being able to talk to him after such a long time. He’s graduated and is now working, and seems very happy with his job. I’m very glad for him. Joel and, Yuritza, and Michael didn’t go either. Joel had auditions this week, and was gone by Thursday night.. hehe.. which I completely forgot about, as is usual… we called the kid while he was still in Chicago to see why he wasn’t in chapter… “ay Ms. Thingy”… I could almost hear him say…

The boy and I went to the opera last night. My friend Joel is a vocal performance major and he had the tickets but couldn’t go. He had just gotten back from the auditions, and he called me last night and asked if I wanted to go and take someone else. Of course I want to go! So I called the boy and asked him if he wanted to go, he said sure (and didn’t tell me he doesn’t enjoy opera too much –but he liked that second one- until we were on our way back) and so it was that the adventure started. I was like 15 min. late (had one of those what-to-wear crisis that I usually don’t have). Joel gave us terrible directions (as in take 75 North, instead of South, to 35 instead of 30… lol…. he was like “you’re gonna laugh” …and I laugh now, but oh gosh, I was stressed out by then… we had 20 mins to get there and we were lost, and there was an unbelievable traffic everywhere (the boy ha already called someone a jackass) … and I was starting to wonder if going back was a better idea… you know… let’s just go back and rent a movie and I can cook dinner (which I haven’t since the spaghetti surprise) and we’ll just have a relaxing evening… I have three hrs of sleep on me and I won’t be able to stress for much longer… and then the boy found the exit! …and so we got there, and my pantyhose and I were the first show of the evening… and we finally got to the theater just in time to hear the voice on the speaker say “The presentation will start in three minutes. There will be no seating after the doors close.” We got in, right on time. The opera was great. it was actually two one-act pieces. He liked the last one and I enjoyed the first one… mainly because by the time the second one had started my eyes couldn’t stay focused anymore. But the acting in the second one was much better. Minino and I had Wendy’s afterwards, and then I got to sleep : )

…and now I have to go back to work : ) hehe… already spent a long time writing this thing… : )

Someone got engaged tonight!!!

Please don't have a heart attack. It wasn't me. The boy jokes about posting the news like this though, given the end-less jokes we were an object of at the A-Psi party last night... two, peeps, two...
But anyways... on to the great news: my boyfriend's sister got engaged tonight! It was such a fun day, and as their mom said, the news were a very pleasant end to a very pleasant walk. The boy's dad got the first call early this morning, when we were all coming back from a half a mile walk in the trail. It was the sister's boyfriend, wanting to ask for permission from the dad. The sister's boyfriend asked the question later on this evening, while we were having dinner, and the sister called her mom right when we got done with the meal. It is official. They are getting married! So today was full of expectation, laughter, tears of happiness, and good wishes... hehe... and lots of phone calls. I got to talk to the boy's sister, right after the news were given to all family members : ) And then I talked to the boy's brother too...
I have a small treasure in my purse... we took pictures of the mom, talking to the daughter, hearing the good news. the dad took the very first pictures of the boy and me together, and the waiter took a picture of us all. fun times, fun times.

a random thought on sonnet 116

http://www.shakespeare-online.com/sonnets/116.html

The thunderous divine summoning that I expected never came. Even in my second year of college, I refused to acknowledge my call to the ministry, believing the assurance of such a call to inescapably involve some kind of a momentous, miraculous, divine apparition. Moses witnessed the burning but inconsumable bush, Paul set his eyes on the resurrected Jesus, and I wanted a sign too, a certain and loud voice telling me that my burning, inconsumable desire to serve the resurrected Jesus had more than a human naissance. But Moses is not the accepted author of the Pentateuch, the historicity of Paul’s vision is surely not demonstrable, and I find myself at the beginning of another stage in my life, knowing exactly where God will take me, and believing in the spiritual power and significance of the Bible, but not knowing how to abide it…

My father has been my spiritual leader for most of my adult life. Throughout my numerous personal disputes with my Hebrew Bible professor, with the Asianist of our department, with the Jesus Seminar, and with countless New Testament scholars, my father has been my ever-fixed mark, the one constant support and voice of advice. His faith seems to be as unshakable as his love. And his example opened my eyes to the beauty of being a wondering bark: that one can wonder without being lost. That if Shakespeare was ever wrong, he erred in making of change a potentially harmful thing... no, it is not the nature of change that is piercingly dangerous, but the nature of ...human condition.

My condition? Still in the middle of Midian...

Una luz... por mas pequeña... sigue siendo una luz

Dad sent his Newsletter today. For those who might not know, my parents are missionaries to Anapra, Mexico. Anapra is a neighborhood in the outskirts of our city, the tragic result of unsuccessful immigration and successful foreign maquiladoras (cheap-labor-exploiting industry). This is the place where many of the people that have immigrated to Mexico or have migrated from Southern Mexico end up at: a place where houses are made out of trash, a place where electric power, water service, and draining systems didn't exist until the end of last year; a place where only a half of a street exists. Where a thousand children are rejected each year by the two elementary schools because of insufficient space. That’s where my family serves.
I read my Dad’s report a few minutes ago, and I remembered. I remembered we’re not as lost as I think. I remembered there’s the heroes… the men and women of God… the people that are strong enough to forget about themselves and give to others. Those who leave a more promising future, and stay where they are because they are needed right where they’ve been placed. That’s my parents. Working as missionaries in Mexico when he was nominated to be a Bishop and she was offered a great job in Mexico’s main university. Teaching the children my government is trying so hard not to acknowledge. Making a difference. Changing the world one life at a time. Or 87, really. Plus teachers, and all of us who are in awe, amazed at them and learning from them every day.
Yes. The world is a terrible place. But man, it’s full of great people!

So here it is, the letter my autodidactic father wrote in English. Getting better every day, isn’t his English great??? Please overlook the lack of spaces btwn some words... a problem I had when pasting... I think I got them all, but then again... this is me talking : )





OCTOBER NEWSLETTER

Today is the first day of November and at the time weare writing this letter, we can’t but thank our Lordfor the blessings he has given to our school Colegio“Susana Wesley” and to our family. We can see Hisfidelity supporting us every moment and under anycircumstances. This year is almost gone, but has leftmany proves that He is Faithful even though we notalways are.

We started this school year with 87 students,unfortunately by now we have lost 4 of them. Two movedfrom Anapra and the other two, who are Americancitizens, have been sent to live at El Paso with arelative. Diana, one of the 4 who left our school,was in third grade, she was with us only for these twomonths. Her parents did not tell us she will not comeanymore, but she did, and she was very sad because shedid not want to go to her old school with “badchildren”. We miss her!

This Monday we received acouple asking information to register their daughterin second grade. If they happen to cover therequirements, she will join us this next Monday. At least 17 students for first grade were not acceptedthis year for not having space for them. We think that next year we might open two groups for firstgraders.

We’d like to ask for your prayers for two of ourstudents, a boy from first grade and a girl of 3rdgrade. Last week employees of the DIF (government office that takes care of family matters like child abuse) came to our school asking for information of these two children, brother and sister. We are worried about this family, and many others, and trying to minister them; unfortunately this is not easy because right now they are so worried about notloosing their children that do not care for spiritual support.

Alter two months now of having our new students, we start to identify the ones that urgently need a changein their lives and in their families, unfortunately many of them are in this situation. Family problems are seen not only in their behaviour but also in their grades. Some of these students failed last year, they come from our school and also from others. With the time you can see a change in their behaviour, their vocabulary, and even in their attitude, but unfortunately as soon as they come back to their homes, real life is again before them with more negative than positive things, so we struggle everyday to help them manage with their family problems.

A few weeks ago we had here in Juarez, the mostimportant cyclists’ event from our state and one ofour students from 3rd grade won a very honoured 2nd place among 250 competitors. Next day, in school, hewas very sad because his father was angry at him for not having the first place. He said his father toldhim he was “disappointed” and that he spent a lot ofmoney on his bicycle. In our weekly worship servicewe told everybody that he was a winner and gave him asa prize, the chance to have whatever he wanted fromthe little store for a week. Besides that, P. E. teacher gave him two extra points for hisaccomplishment. This is only an example of how some of our children are treated, the kind of change that families from our Anapra need is the kind of change that only God can do. We’d also like to say also that many parents are doing their best on raising their children.

We are very surprised to see that many of our students stay late at school, some of them stay because of the Rondalla rehearsal until 2:45, seems like they prefer to be here at school than at home. It is sad to hearfrom them that they feel better at school, I rememberthat I hated being at school, I was anxious for the bell to ring so I could go back home; so, they wanting to stay at school is something I cant really understand.

We have good news too: The land of the school has been totally paid! We would like to thank a family from Ohio for their generous offering that we received when visiting them, we pray for blessings for them and for all of you that are supporting ourministry spiritually and financially. Another good new is that we finally were able to install a phone at the school office since this month. We do not like thenumber, but there was nothing we could do about it.
The number, dialing from the USA is:
011-52 (656) 666-4436

We are at school, but not often in the office,weekdays from 8 to 2:30, soon we will start classes half hour later because of the winter season, ourclasses really end at 1:30 but for many reasons we areusually there at least for an hour more. There is a lot of work to be done at Anapra and honestly more than this time is needed. Dina is now helping not only as the principal but also as a 4th grade teacher, but she still has to go back at 12:00 for her second shift at the high school that starts at 2:00.

Today was paid day, and again we had to use our faith, for until last Friday we had money enough to pay only two of our 6 teachers, we did not have money for the lady (wife of a missionary from Chiapas) that helps as a janitor, nor to pay the Social Security (about 600.00 dollars a month). We praise the Lord that we finally received a check from one of our sponsors whopromised to send a monthly check. It was good enough to pay our teachers and the Social Security Fees! Sometimes I think that the Lord keeps on testing our faith, and that He knows we need a lot of praying.

FAMILY:
Sarai is 6 months pregnant and it is a baby boy, both of them seem to be fine. Misael and Abi are about tofinish the second period of their “six weeks” anddoing very well at school. Arely is already making plans for her graduation (Praise the Lord!) from S. M.U. and they took her pictures already. Dina is still working hard and has an appointment this coming Fridayto see when her surgery will be performed (pray forher please). And about me, well I have to say that Ihad a “little” accident while playing with Misael andhad a few stitches. I hurt my arm and the problem is that I have an infection almost immediately and still dealing with that since last Friday. I am doing well, it really does not hurt that bad, and I am ready for the next wound!Please keep praying for our ministry and for our family. We are still waiting for the answer of theschool’s certification. We were told that we will haveto wait maybe until next year, we are worried about it. All the work has been finally done, just waiting for their answer. We need your prayers! We are praying for you all, and our children pray for you every day and especially every Friday at our worship service when we read your names from the wall and thank our Lord for your support. God Bless you!

In His Service,

Antonio y Dina Briones

my computer crashed...

... it won't even turn on. I haven't been able to take it to get fixed. I think I'll have Fer look at it first. I had to write the first two pages of an essay three times that day, though. It was fun... so much fun. Not having a computer is a surprisingly strenuous situation. I am such a terribly forgetful person, and a very in so I have to keep up with emails, memos, paperwork… so I’ve been running to and from the library quite a lot lately…
Pero bueno, sin importer que mi computadora y mi carro se han tomado turnos para vovler mi vida miserable, todo va bien… jeje…
Ay Dios… que contarles? Solo estoy feliz de que el semestre este a punto de terminar (solo falta un mes!) y de que cada vez tengo menos trabajo por terminar. La lista se vuelve pequena, gracias a Dios.
El pastor de Kansas me ha escrito. Ya empezaba a preocuparme por mi futuro academico… aun no le he dicho a mi padre que se Perkins no es una opcion. Pobre familia mia, cada vez que llamo es para dar malas noticias. Que el carro, que la computadora, que las 22 hrs que me quedan por cumplir… una cosita sobre otra. Llevo ya varias noches sin poder dormir. Anoche me fui a la cama muy temprano, pero aun asi di vueltas hasta temprano en la manana, y luego sufri mas de lo comun (que en si ya es mucho) para levantarme.
Janie had a dream last night that I was doing cocaine with Salma Hayeck, got caught, and run someone over when we were trying to escape. Good gracious… I don’t even think I like Hayeck all that much.
I haven’t really gone out with my friends lately. Aleks is going crazy with school, Janie lives 45 mins away from campus, and the chapter has been going nuts too with all the stuff we need to do before the semester is over. I need to get a book. I feel so guilty, though, reading a book of my choice when I know I have so much to read for my classes… I think what I need to do is sleep. But for some reason that hasn’t worked all that well either. Maybe I just really do need my social life back. But no… gotta get through this semester. I have to pull off this 18hrs business so they’ll let me take 22… May. It will all be over in May… December, really… my insomnia does go away when I go home : )

I was looking at my tree the other day… I have a favorite tree on campus… I think it has a very poetic structure. But well, I realized there has been an important tree at every stage of my life. My life has been marked by trees. The lemon tree in front of my house in Monterrey, the papaya, the fig tree in Chihuahua, that Chamizal tree, my grandmother’s berry in Cd. Juarez, and the tree at SMU. Each has a story…
Trees have a strong symbolic power. In ancient mythology, they are what connects heaven and earth, they are the symbol of a long life, they represent strength, and they embody the very nature of life, and of life after death. Jesus’ birth, life, and death are deeply connected to this same tree symbolism… trees… trees…

I do need to sleep.

Still going crazy...

Well, I'm supposed to be sleeping, but I can't, as usual, after such a crazy day... that and I'm hungry for some reason (and snack-less, quite regretfully), despite the Wendy's chicken sandwiches my "twenty-something with a significant other" (as his father called him and his siblings in one of his bog’s comments) and I had a few hours ago... so I’m back to my computer, as I do whenever I have insomnia, and since I’m not the innate web-surfer my boyfriend seems to be, I simply tend to write, after reading and browsing for a bit… and so, here it goes:

*** Family: Dad and Misi (Misael, my brother) were playing paintball on Friday. Dad called me that same night to check on me and to let me know he had been sown… he has four stitches in his arm. I told him I don’t know crazier people than them two… he only laughed… and I just had to overcome that little chill, and take it as a joke too. Boys will be boys… Dads will be dads… and to a point… jeje… dads will be boys too.

Mom talked to me after him, just to make fun of him, which of course, was her way of relieving stress. You see, in my family, Mom and I are the calm, tempered ones. The rest of our family says we’re cold. I think we’re not. We’re pretty warm, we just have unusual ways of showing it. We’re the care-takers, the responsible ones. Mom’s the person in charge of finances, the one who’s always on top of the ball, the strict one. Strong character. I’m the strict sister too… but I’m also the one who makes them learn Psalms, and Bible verses, and poetry, and reads with them at night, and taught them how to ride their bike, and how to dress up, and how to connect the Play Station… and I miss them every minute of the day. Dad has a warm, sweet, character. He’s the one to go to when you need special permissions (he’ll most likely say yes, unless there’s something horribly wrong with what you’re asking). He’s the one with the jokes, with the fun questions, with the good memory when it comes to friends. But still, I think it is Mom that I go to when I need a confidante. Sarai and Misael are both quick-tempered, but have learned to take control of their character. I admire that in them. they’ve learned to be considerate, to open up… and they are both incredibly smart. I think they’re also a good looking pair, if I may say so. Abi (I call her “Cositas”) is my baby girl. Ok, so she’s not a baby anymore. But she is her sweet, caring self, and she always will be. She’s the one her friends go to for advice, the one other girls used to choose as a Mom when they played house. Sarai (she won’t accept my “Saris”) is married and expecting her first baby. She and her husband have been working on their new home forever, and I wonder if they will be able to get it ready by the time the baby comes. It’s going to be a boy, we think, so far. I’m going to be an aunt!!

*** School: went to see my advisor this Friday …
… and realized I could have graduated with a 3.6-3.8. but… I won’t, mainly because I chose not to do the pass/fail option for my science courses.. and now I have two Cs in my transcript… and they have really done a lot of damage, much more than I thought I would… and now I’ll be getting a 3.4- 3.5, if I do really well both semesters this year. All As and Bs… and two Cs… who would have thought?!?
The good news are, as it turned out be, that I can “petition” for two classes I’ve taken to count as perspectives, and if that happens, I'll be taking 16 hours (as opposed to 22). The hope of a less stressful semester does calm me a little bit. But then I wonder how easy of a semester it will be, nevertheless, if I'll be taking 15 hours of advanced literature... and no religion courses, as I thought I would. I just really hope it won’t be 22... wish me luck... sniff… the paperwork at this school is simply never-ending… a circle that won’t ever close… a 2000 pg book… a horrifying maze… hehe…. ay Dios!
Classes so far… well, I have two essays due at the beginning of next week, so I’ll be working all day tomorrow. I read all day today… and I forgot to have dinner yesterday (yeah… I was reading)… and I haven’t caught up with school yet… well, I did, and then I got behind again. Every time I get two or three concurrent essays, I end up getting a little behind in my readings… and so it happens, I am forever stressing out about my work schedule. The agenda doesn’t work when you are not able to keep up with it.
I have a full day, so I don’t usually get to see the boy until late at night. I get out of my last class at 8 on Mon Weds, and I don’t get out of chapter till 9 on Thursdays, and I was reading until 8pm today, I think.
Applications: AGH!! Back to the darn education system… combine that with the immigration problem… with politics… with … agh… complete and total disrespect for people, simply on the basis of nationality. DAMN IT! Nationality influences a person’s cultural, social, and perhaps even educational identity, but for the life of me… it DOES NOT AFFECT ONE’S PROFESSIONAL IDENTITY!! I will develop my professional career here or in Mexico or in Spain or in South America, and whatever I do for a living, whether I work in a middle school or an elementary school, and whether it’s at home or not, my work will be done with excellence, and I am convinced that I will contribute to that place’s education level. I'm offended. I, like most educators, have NOT made my professional choice based on the prospect of an affluent life-style. I am moved by a personal need to serve. I am here because this is the ministry I’ve been called to. Because I love to do what I do, because it’s such a huge part of me, because it’s the greatest profession of all. And no, I won’t sign that application. I will not pledge to go back to my country as soon as I finish grad school. I won't sign because I might stay. Because perhaps, even though I’d earn more in Mexico right now than I would here if I were to stay, perhaps I will decide to stay and help my people. There is so much to do here, so much to change. There is so much to change in this entire continent! Our education system is inneffective and socially inconstant... all over (this is it's one constant!) Perhaps I will go to South America. I might return home. Or I maybe I will go to Mexico City and work with SEP. But whether I stay or leave, I will not sign. I find this irrespectful, and I defend my right to choose where I wish to live and work. If Immigration has decided I am a valuable student/worker, why will a University show me the door? If there’s such a terrible need for educators, and if the need for bilingual educators is even greater, I am at a loss for words. I find no true defense or explanation. How can they send much needed teachers back? How can they tell a potential student that they must filter out those who use this univerity for non-professional goals? I am offended, and I will not sign. Much rather go even farther away from home to continue studying… I can go to Kansas, or Boston, or Mexico City… or if it came down to it, I’d much rather not continue studying... or go back to Spain. I will not sign.
Ok… so I have nothing but complaints about school… I have very serious problems with the education system… but I will stop …on to more pleasant topics!

*** So the boy… the boy has been my solace all this time. Sometimes I wonder if he knows all that’s going through this head of mine… he can read my emotions perfectly well, though. He finds words to my thoughts, when I can’t seem to explain myself… and he surprises me every time… I wonder if he knows that he is just as complex to me as I must be to him… and his sense of humor… gosh, his sense of humor is so different from mine! … I am convinced he has a lot more fun than me.
I’ve also found he has a rather interesting thought life. I think that unlike me, he does not express half his feelings… or his thoughts. Politeness should be somewhat (I repeat: somewhat) overpowered by friendship. I’m still wondering if he really wanted to go to that restaurant… and I’m glad he kicks me out, despite all my growling, and sends me back to studying each time.
So I can’t call him by his name, given that his brother’s reasons (safety and reserve) for anonymity are shared by the boy and by the rest of his friends and family… and I don’t know what to call him. In the future, I might use Quijote, the nickname he uses for his blog posts and comments. And of course, I’ll use “the boy” … and “Minino” (Cat), if the occasion permits -- he has called me “Ardilla” (Squirrel) and both Spanish nicknames came about because of a strange conversation we had one night when he was taking me home… we have deduced it is the squirrels’ mafia that owns this campus… SMU… get it? … hehe… I did say it had been a strange conversation… We enjoy this stuff… hehe… the greatness of simplicity …
He has a great group of friends. Val, nos estan ganando… jeje… cuidado que son mas!! I can see they love each other so much. They’ve made such a positive impression on me. Perhaps I’ve made some mistakes in my judgment of this society… and I am so glad to see that!!!
So Quijote and I went to the Dallas Museum of Arts two weekends ago. I had a blast. Hehe… but I’m afraid he didn’t enjoy the… vanguard art… or how should I call it? I am absolutely sure they’ve named this kind of performances… but in any way, this type performance is a very modern approach to theater arts, and I would say that what we saw that night was in essence beautiful and striking. No, not terrible. It was genius. It was a very astonishing mix of poetry, every-day life situations and wording, and a very musical, mathematical ordering of motions and use of the stage. The way they used the space, and their very scant props, and the degree of emotion in their corporal motions and in their facial expressions…I enjoyed the lyrical beauty of it, even the satirical wit of it… I enjoyed every minute of it. I thought it was rare and beautiful.
Like what we have.
Lol… I am amazed at how people’s experiences are so different, even when the object of experience is the same… talk about Chistology… lol… tell this to the Jesus Seminar!! Ay… that’s a whole other story…

*** Friends…. VAL IS MOVING TO MCALLEN!!! Good Lord… how far is that from here??? She’s going to live there for 6 or 7 months… all hopes of her coming here are gone, but I am very, very happy for her. She emailed me today to tell me about it, and I was so glad to hear from her, and to see she had been able to make a choice, and that she sounded so at peace with it… hehe… she said she’s psychologically preparing herself for the “trip” … I think it’s her mother who’s gonna need a visit to the psychologist after this one… lol… Val has never left home, and she’s been her entire family’s emotional support all this time. I think it very healthy for her to give them some space, some space for them to learn to deal with decisions and hardships without her. And a break from all of it for her. Val, you deserve this, and they need it, as terrible as it might sound. Besides, hehe.. you’ll be doing some learning too… I’ve always wondered how good of a cook you could possibly be… lol…

*** Room and board. The boy doesn’t like his apartment as much as he liked living with his ex roommate. I don’t know if it’s the fact that the kitchen is too small, or that the stove had a gas leak at the beginning of the semester, or if it’s because the place is old… I don’t know if it’s any of this, or if he really just misses the comfort of brotherly company. I realized how not-at-home I feel in my own room sometimes. I must share space, light, time, mess, noise, and even my personal life, with four girls. It’s very nice girls, that’s not the problem (although I do miss Aleks, my ex-roommate, and one of my best friends). I’m grateful they’re all so much fun and so considerate. With the exception of my preference of warm weather and my roommate’s need of a 60 degree room temperature, I’ve had no problems with them at all. I just miss having some privacy… feeling like it makes a difference if I clean up… doing a little nestling, making the place look a little more like me.
So I end up pestering the boy… and my friends… and spending lots of time at the Hughes Trigg commons…
And staying up till 3am blogging because I cannot sleep… hehe… naw… that’s just me. I just don’t sleep much…
I’ll go to bed, though… I can think some more in there… I’ll have to kick my roommates’ friends out… I figure if I start getting ready and get in bed, they’ll feel uncomfortable enough to go… hehe. I have to explain though: this is not a normal thing, her bringing people over this late. And they came in bc I wasn’t sleeping. I was already here, writing away… and I feel bad... they're having some serious bonding time... maybe they'll continue in the lobby? my head hurts a little... and I'm still mad at this school and at the education system. ok… enough writing… lol… good night…

Pase lo que pase...

So much is going on lately...
The car is finally working. It's been quite a fun experience. After struggling with the darn thing for two days, I took it to the shop where I usually go for more complicated problems. I asked they guy if he knew of a place where I could pay to get it done. He said he'd do it for me, that it was the simplest thing on earth. I suppose it is, since it took him five minutes. God, I felt so terribly bad. Me, always saying I can do things on my own, always saying I don't need a guy to do things for me. I had to ask for help... to do "the simplest thing on earth." But well, it's done. And the guy also checked the breaks, just to make sure the noise I've been hearing didn't come from some other problem. He said the car was in great condition.... well, I sure hope it really is... after all this trouble. Dad said I'm supposed to change the oil early Nov. So I shouldn't have to think about that car of mine for another week. Thank God.
Called Dad yesterday. It was nice hearing from him. He had all sorts of questions. Graduation, grad school, the boy, some other calls I was supposed to make, other things I was supposed to take care of.... turns out I'm doing fairly good. I went through the list, and came out spotless... did it all, people! Can't imagine having to deal with real life. I am starting to think I am not as ready for real life as my friends and family keep telling me I am. I have to admit, I am terribly scared.
Pero bueno, que pase lo que vaya a pasar. Venga, que lista o no, siempre salgo a flote!
I miss my family and my friends terribly. I talked to Val yesterday. Gosh... I was wishing we were at Limoneros... drinking coffee, eating crepes... talking away... I need girl time very badly. She might move from El Paso very soon. I hope wherever she goes, she'll be able to visit more often. I can't wait to be financially stable, so I can make a trip or two as well. We had entertained the idea of her moving in with me, but she has to go where the jobs are. I am so glad she is getting so many offers. Her voice was light and happy, and it sounded so much more like her. Well, never mind. Val will always be Val. And I miss spending time with her... going out, staying at home, talking about ridiculous stuff or trying to theorize the world to pieces. We have decided to start a school together. That has always been my dream. A school of my own where I could put my little ideological theories into practice. A real school... where people can learn to learn...

Mi abuelo está mucho mejor. Sigue preocupado por mis tíos, pero se siente mejor. Mis primos han estado visitando un poco más de lo normal, y creo que eso le hace muchísimo bien. No quiero aceptarlo, pero mi abuelo empieza a dar señales de vejez. Una pequeña espinita que se le ha enterrado a mi Mamá, y que no me he a dejado dormir por varias noches... sigo pensando, tratando de convencerme... cómo es posible tener raíces en dos lugares tan remotos? Cómo dividirme en dos?

Isa viene pronto!! Visita Chicago el 26 de diciembre... y adivinen a quién le han dado permiso de viajar en plenas vacaciones de invierno??? A mí, señores, a mí!! Estoy que exploto de la emoción. Estoy seguro que si alguno de uds. le conociese a ella o a mis chicos anglos hispano-hablantes, les sería imposible no quererles. Mis amigos son pocos, pero verdaderos. Les veo pronto, chicos, muy pronto!

My friend Julie is in LA. She posted a little message on my facebook profile today. Or at least I saw it today. I realized how much I miss her. A veces me pregunto cómo es que nunca logré hacer amistad con ellas. Bueno, con Julie si, pero las demás? Somos tan iguales, y tan diferentes. Tenemos un amor por el Señor en común... será la cultura? será que tengo una teología distinta? Será cuestión de personalidad? No logro entender como es que agradándome tanto, no lograron ser amigas... tres años, y no les conozco como debería...


Well.. gotta go... my fraternity brothers are going to a fancy dinner and I´m their ride...

Responsable, yo?

I am going crazy. Now please, don't get me wrong. I am perfectly aware of how blessed I am. I am a free, happy, healthy person. Life for me is difficult in a whole different way: responsibility.

Responsible... I am responsible for my education, for my family, for leaving a mark on this world... precisely because I am so blessed, I am to be held accountable for what I do with my gold coins. What should I do with them? Am I doing the right thing? when my responsibilities seem to clash, am I going the right way? ... am I being a good sister, living so far away and missing my little siblings' most important years of their development? Or am I being true to God's calling for my life by remaining strong and staying where he has put me? Am I being strong by remaining the president of a fraternity, even though I cannot always give it my 200%, or am I proving weak by not giving my college career the importance it deserves and spending too much time elsewhere? Should I take a more active role in VCM, like I did before? Am I forgetting the importance of my personal goals, or am I doing the right thing in thinking of others when taking decisions? Am I doing enough? Am I doing too much? Am I being responsible, or am I stretching it? Am I going crazy, as I say, or am I simply avoiding the problem?

This is my last year of college. I have learned so much these past four years. And yet I cannot help wonder if I have met the goal. How well have I done? Have I been the Christian, the friend, the leader, the sister, the daughter, the girlfriend, the fraternity member, the co-worker, the person I told myself (and others) I would be ? Will I leave this place knowing I've made it a better place by having been here? Oh gosh... will I leave this place at all?

Responsible... me? I feel so terribly lost sometimes... so far away from my true self, so far away from my faith, from my personal standards, from that part of me that knows exactly what that Voice is telling her... from that person who hears God's voice and is strong enough to obey it, even when it hurts. How did I end up loosing my balance, how did my feet leave the rock and stepped into the sand? how did I start doubting, how did I start questioning God? how did I stop painting and drawing and writing...? how did I start concealing things from Mom and Dad? when did I stop reading the Bible, and praying for my family, and going to church on a constant basis, and openly learning from others? where did I go? where should I go from here?

I have so much to think about... so many decisions to make, so much to do, I have promises to keep, things to learn. and I have to admit, as simple as all of this might seem, it's these questions that make me hide... but no. I need to get to work. I need to stop the laziness..

... I've been floating... somewhere in between Sunday services, people, and school...

...it has always taken me a while to wake up...

Fin de semana

Fui a casa : )
Sara me invitó el domingo antepasado. Sus amigos y ella iban a ir a Juárez a la carrera del Chupacabras... asi que me fuí con ellos este fin de semana. Realmente extrañaba estar en casa. Salimos de aquí el viernes a la 1pm, llegamos a casa a la 1am, dormimos, nos levantamos temprano a las 6am, los llevé al sitio de salida para la carrera, y Sara y yo regresamos a mi casa para descansar un poco y esperar a Mamá, que cocinó pollo con espageti y chile poblano, uno de mis favoritos. Fue de lo mejor. Estar en casa me hace mucho bien... ver a mis hermanos, que crecen cada día más, y a mis papás y a mis abuelos y tíos y primos... les extrañaba mucho...
Misael estuvo un poco emocional. Lo malo de ir a casa y llevar personas es que me tengo que dividir... creo que no logré hacerlo a la perfección. Me siento un poco triste al respecto. Preferiría que alguno de mis amigos se sintiera a que Misi se sienta mal... Papá está un poco enfermo... Mamá estaba cansada... pero al fin nos la pasamos bien de cualquier manera, como siempre... y fue un gran respiro de aire fresco para mi.

Mi hermana Sarai esta... super embarazada... es increíble... tiene un apartato extraño, conectado a unos audífonos, que ayuda a escuchar al bebé dentro de ella. Increíble... el pequeño se mueve, y podía escuchar los latidos de su corazón!

Extrañé a Val. No la encontré y no la pude ver. Espero verla en noviembre.

Este fin de semana me voy a Austin... y a Houston. Regionales para Alpha Psi.

Ryan tiene a sus amigos aquí, y fue agradable conocerles. Me sentía un poco enfermita, pero los chicos son muy lindos, y aunque Ryan está un poco estresado, creo que verles le hizo bien. Andrew es un chico que a mi parecer sabe mucho. Un chico educado y agradable. Ryan dice que es tradicional... no se... creo que está justo en el centro. Me agradó mucho. Ty es un chico extrovertido, de sonrisa afable. Fue fácil hablar con él.

Mi auto sirve. Por fin. Estoy emocionada. Ha sido un poco estresante.. y costó dinero... pero tengo carro otra vez.

¿Qué mas? creo que es todo... debo irme pronto. ... de hecho debo irme ya.
Un beso.

...Going home

Yeah... going home, people : ) this Friday ! Sarah, a friend of mine from Victory Campus Ministry is helping some crazy bikers... Friends of hers... to drive to Juarez for the Chupacabras race (si.. es enserio, asi la han llamado)... sooooo... I get to go home with them : )
My sister is six months pregnant, and I'm excited about seeing her. My baby sister has started breaking hearts, my brother is getting better at painball... my Dad is PAINTING THE HOUSE!! ...which I think is amazing. I love him for doing that kind of thing. he's painting it because I'm taking my friends home. so strangely thoughful of him... Im sure he doesn't realize I really don't care... hope he knows I'm proud not be a rich kid. I know he knows there is absolutely no way a wall with the marks of Misael's (my brother) basketball cannot possibly be a bad thing... I'd show it off.. the way Im always telling people about how noisy, and how busy, and how all-over you, and how honest, and scary, and how GREAT my family is. We love that about our family, we all do. and even though he knows all this, he's painting the house. just because my friends are coming. I love him.

Latino Rhythm was good. crazy stuff happened, as usual... I'm gonna start that list I've told Ryan so much about... "Crazy Things I've Put Ryan Through" hehe... all the things I should (but really won't) apologize for. let's see...

** ridiculous AIMs
** conversations about cheese, camels, fries, asymmetric symmetry, past relationships, alumni... oh yeah, and religion
** 2 am dinner...breakfast?
** long, pointless walks ... and j-walking (is that how you spell that??)
** ketchup-less fries
** finally
** "interesting, but fun" bars
** krogger's receipts...
** dry fish
** grammatical horrors
** life threats (not all pronounced by me)
** strange friends
** public dancing
** looOooong speeches... and unfulfilling dinners
** public kissing... lol...
** colds (ok... dont really know if that was me... )
** bad cake
** snoring
** dirty carpet
** bad jazz-listening attention span
** day-dreaming
** me, thinking out-loud ALL the time...
** ridiculous shorts... thongs? ... and strange music at tonight's event... (not worn by me!!)
** Cholula... and the rest of the actors, for that matter...

ok... I'm just gonna stop writing... too much... Ryan, dear. this is not an apology. this is me thinking "out loud"... that's all. I enjoyed them all too much ...couldn't possibly be sorry : ) !

I had a midterm today. It went well. I cant concentrate lately, tho... I need to start doing some daily studying... some serious daily studying... go to Bridwell more often, go out less often. perhaps I'm too much of a social person... "Ay, no, Miss Thinggy..." me dice Joel... yeah... I know I need to sleep more.. I will...I will...

I will. Im going to sleep. night everyone...

Borrón y cuenta nueva

So yesterday was the Jewish new year, and today, when the moon comes out, Ramadan will start. A new beginning and a time fore spiritual journey. I've been doing a lot of reading the past few days, and as usual, the readings have made quite an impact on me. I wonder sometimes if my worldview is beautifully fluid or stupidly unstable. In any case, my perception of reality seems to transform and adjust every time new knowledge comes to me, and this makes me think that perhaps no belief at all is sustainable, and therefore worth to be kept. An occasional, but remarkably disturbing idea.
But then I realize that this cannot be true. Whether I have enough wisdom and knowledge to assimilate it as it is or not, reality can only be one. Either the world is flat, or it is round; God either exists, or he doesn’t. Either a belief is sustainable, or it’s not. And since reality is one, there must be one true notion of it. And I am left with the only hope that the changes in my belief system are evolutionary.
They normally do feel like they are. But it is the process in between the change from a specific principle to another that I find myself in danger. Perhaps this is that gray area that Jesus talks about so much in the Gospels… that ambiguous place in human consciousness that lies right after a major challenge, that shallow spot where you cannot find your true belief. When in doubt, I should simply not act. But if I do have to do something, if a decision has to be made, then I do as I wish… not as I believe I should. I do what I think is best for me, not what is right. And more often than not, the right thing to do would have been a much more beneficial option for me…
So what do I do if I’m in doubt, if I cannot find the answer and I have no time to make a choice? Does one let the chance go by, or does one make a choice? Will I have a choice later on if I let this one go? Is there a rule, or does it depend on the situation? Damn… I want to be a kid again… I want to be able to believe blindly, to trust the way I used to…

Life makes that a little hard on me sometimes. I didn’t sleep last night. In fact, I should be studying right now, not trying to figure the world out… not trying to see what my role in it is… but I can’t… I have responsibilities, I have to get things done, I have to make sure people get things done. I have to do things when people don’t get them done… how do you guys say it? The show must go on. Life isn’t gonna stop and wait for me to think things through… and in a way, I’m glad it doesn’t. I need that challenge. Maybe I’ve had too many do-overs. I’ve started all over again too many times.

I had a terribly stressful meeting on Friday. It was my DOP, my Chapter Director. I’m the chapter president this year, and despite the chapter’s great performance, alumni still complain, still worry, still question. And apparently, I am fully, entirely accountable to this chapter director, who has the obligation of going to just one chapter meeting… who hasn’t been to one chapter event. It makes me mad, and to be honest, it did put me in a defensive mood. I remained polite, though even if a little firm. And I must admit that despite the unfairness of the alumni-undergraduate situation, the chapter’s director is trying to help. I do think that it takes more than a simplistic “I’m-in-power” attitude to be a leader. I do not respect uninvolved alumni, but I’m trying to see her questioning as a rough, but honestly concerned attempt to become involved. So I’ll give her a chance. But man, I’m really not liking it…

I don’t always have a problem with authority. Not if I respect the leader, not if I see the leader’s intentions of helping and guiding. Sometimes leadership does not even come along with authority. Sometimes it’s a sincere attempt to point someone into the right direction. Like a guy who has been in a relationship for a long time approaching a friend who is just starting a relationship. Like a nonpretentious girl coming to you asking if you need someone to talk to. Like an alumni offering to help you organize an event. Well... come to think about it, I it is leadership I have no problem with. Perhaps authority has a whole other meaning to it.

I’ve been too busy for it to be healthy. But I’m going home this weekend… which will relieve stress but will make me even busier. Sometimes things like that make no sense, and you still know what the right option is. I wish I had such a love for my vocation that I knew what I want to do with my life, even if it didn’t make sense. I miss my family so terribly. I miss my old self.

That’s one of the things I like about my relationship with Ryan. It has helped me remember the person I really am. It has taken me back to the willingness to do things right, even if it doesn’t always happen that way. I haven’t seen Ryan since Sunday. He is a little sick, and I am going crazy with midterms and papers and church and Alpha Psi. I miss him a little bit, but not seeing me has for some reason made it seem less of a surreal experience. I’m a little scared. Last time I thought a guy was too good to be true… well, he was too good to be true. And what will I do when school ends? What if I have to leave? But despite all the questions I always ask, I’m excited about it too… want to see where all of this takes us. I want to enjoy his company, and really get to know him better.

Cooking, walking, dancing... and all that jazz...

I've made a lot of mistakes. I've gotten hurt, I've hurt others... and I'm done with ridiculous, unnecesary problems. There are good and bad things about this relationship. The good side of it is him. I'm always telling him he is trouble, but he's not. He is the exact opposite. He's the kind of guy who walks all the way to a dorm and then back to his place each night just so I won't walk by myself in the dark. He's the guy dancing with me in front of an auditorium full of Hispanic people and doesn't care and still has fun. He's the friend I talk to when I need to vent about a long day. He's the spontaneous joker, the intelligent conversator, the amazing kisser. He's the time in the day when I relax and feel like myself again. And speaking of time.. I'm supposed to be sleeping now... I haven't been able to sleep this week. so much to think about... so much to do... and just a few hours in the day... I want to cook, and walk, and dance, and get in trouble... but no, I'm gonna go to sleep instead. I'm gonna try, at least... it is so late...

Writer's block

Ok... I give. I like him. and I said I was gonna stay out of trouble. I did... for what ..two weeks? We had dinner together last night. We both cooked, and two of my friends came over to eat and left right away. I lost, by the way. Took me two hours to get the fish done... didn't come out all that great either. I say it would've been so much better if the fish had been whole... lol... at least that's my story. I'm sticking to it : ) ! After an hour of salsa-dancing lessons, we went out for some ice cream... and he finally kissed me. So there. We're both in trouble. But he was holding my hand last night, and I felt safe, for the first time in a very, very long time. Writer's block. I get it now.

De todo un poco

Rush terminó. Finalmente. Después de nueve eventos consecutivos, uno detrás del otro... necesitábamos descansar. Me dá gusto porque ahora es tiempo para el chapter. Podemos planear nuestro Formal. Podemos hacer servicio comunitario. Podemos hacer muchas cosas más.
Well, other from that, I think the week has passed by pretty fast. All the normal stuff (school, church, A'Psi) and some other things... No he dormido mucho esta semana. Por culpa de dos ensayos, una clase de filosofía, y un nuevo amigo. Esta semana decidí leer y estudiar como es debido, y he trabajado duro para reponerme de la semana anterior. Anoche estudié con un grupo de amigos, y un chico con el que salí el fin de semana pasado me llamó mientras mis amigos y yo estudiábamos. Se nos unió, pero la verdad es que yo estaba algo incómoda. Cuando el chico iba de vuelta a casa, intentó besarme... le dije que no... pero luego me quedé pensando: I was smiling when I said "Sorry, man... can't do this." "What... why? You can't kiss me?" and I just grabbed him by the shoulder, turned him around, and pushed him. "I'll see you around" I said. He kept walking, but turned his face to me... he was confused, but still smiling. "ok... see you around." he stared for a second and then he left. WHY did I think it was comical? Why was I smiling? ... and then I didn't really give it a second thought. I said no, and I didn't take it seriously (at all), and I didn't feel bad for the boy (granted, we went on two dates, but I usually still feel horrible!), and I went back to the lab where my friends were studying and kept reading... and now I'm thinking... what is wrong with me? I don't get attached to people so easily any more, and I wonder if it's really such a great thing... I smiled... !!
Grandfather called me yesterday too. No lo hace muy seguido. Me preocupé un poco. Me pidió que orara por mi tío Darío, por su familia, y por él y mi abuela. Ultimamente ha estado un poco estresado, y bueno, no es bueno que un hombre de su edad se preocupe tanto. Seguiré orando... le llamé a mi tío ese mismo día... fé, hay que tener fé.
Esta semana hice un buen amigo. Le he visto mucho... hoy fuimos (Yuritza, él, y yo) a ver una película que la escuela presentó, y después intentamos estudiar. Terminamos en la terraza del Student Center, platicando de todo un poco. Si logro encontrar quien me lleve de compras (mi carro sigue descompuesto), mañana será día de cocina. Vamos a cocinar en casa de Aleks. He estado esperando toda la semana... dos semanas de piso limpio y mi orgullo culinario están en peligro... veremos... si hace espageti está muerto : ) le gano con la mano en la cintura!
I've been busy this week. Haven't gone running ...at all. The Dedman center opens tomorrow, though... I'll go check it out this weekend. I'm trying to get back on track. Getting organized, reading for all my classes, researching jobs/grad schools, putting my emotions together, staying in touch with my family, fixing my car's battery and getting insurance... got lots to do bf I can say I'm back on track. I need to make sure I don't loose focus again... it's just a little hard with so many distractions! ... I need my sanity, though... can't have too much of a good time. I promise I won't work too much either. We had CHAS meeting today, and Fernando had to take the sign-up sheets from me so I didn't get so involved. then dinner with the chapter, then dinner with the NO students, then the academic session (well...), then chapter, then movie time (Corpse Bride... cute, but gloomy... ), then "studying". Fer wanted me to go dancing with him.... I REALLY wanted to go... but no, I needed to read and sleep. and I did... and I will...
So much has happened in such short time... need to slow down a little bit...
alright... Im gonna go sleep, that's what Im gonna do...

Como si no pasara nada...

Me parece que me he desprendido por completo de mi propia realidad.

Han sido tres semanas espantosas. Dos ensayos la primera semana, el comienzo de Rush para mi fraternidad, como cinco o seis juntas de MGC, y un encuentro inesperado con cierto pastor al que no habia visto desde hacia tiempo. La segunda semana tuvimos dos eventos, trabajo/escuela hasta las 8 todas las noches, mi carro me hiso una jugada, dos noches sin dormir. La semana pasada, un buen fin de semana, pero lo pague con una semana de dias sin noches: dos ensayos, una fiesta que organizar, un servicio comunitario, un car-wash frustrado... mejor dejemoslo asi. El punto es que no he dormido bien, no he comido bien, al parecer no he estudiado bien (hoy me regresaron tres ensayos, dos Bs y una A-), y no he dibujado o pintado en solo-Dios-sabe cuanto tiempo. Ah, y estoy en la quiebra.

Y sinembargo me siento bien. Los chicos de la fraternidad han trabajado duro, y todo ha valido la pena. Y la escuela se ha vuelto un poco rutinaria, pero la rutina me ha dado cierto control y no me deja olvidar que no estoy aqui solamente por la escuela, que la vida real es mejor que los libros. Y me siento bien porque he aprendido mucho de mi de los que me rodean, y estoy satisfecha con lo que he hecho. Asi que estoy cansada, y un poco confundida, pero no puedo quejarme: tengo la suerte de ser feliz.

It's the simple details that make up life's greatness, no es cierto? Son los eventuales, sorpresivos rayos de luz que despiertan la vista, como si fuese de man~ana, los que an~aden sabor a la vida. Son las amistades inesperadas, las platicas rebundantes, los buenos libros, los pies humedos, los ensayos terminados : ), los abrazos de un amigo, the follow-up questions, las respuestas honestas, las miradas que observan, la gente que escucha, y no solamente oye... la lluvia... los arboles de noche, las comidas a destiempo... la buena musica!! ... y no, no puedo quejarme, no seria justo, porque disfruto de todo esto

Anoche fue una de aquellas veladas extran~as. Estuve platicando con un amigo mio por un buen tiempo (... y otra vez, olvide conservar la conversacion...) y mientras hablaba con el, otro chico intento llamarme. Son tres chicos los que han intentado esta semana, pero este es el mas persistente. O el mas obvio.. no se cual es la palabra. Es un buen chico, guapo, estudioso. Un buen amigo. Pero me gustaria que fueramos solo amigos. No se como decirle... y bueno, el caso de todo este palabrerio es que queria evadirlos, a el y al otro chico que tambien empezo a mandarme AIMs, y el pobre de Ryan termino pagando las consecuencias. Todo lo que el habia hecho era hablar de queso, de idiotas, y de estudiantes locas. Pero en fin, el pobre tuvo que pagar el precio de buenas conversaciones conmigo. Lo hice caminar hasta Taco Bell, que estaba cerrado, y luego a Burger King, que tambien estaba cerrado. Despues de deambular por las calles como nin~os perdidos, terminamos ordenando de la ventanilla!! la primera vez que ordeno de la ventanilla, andando! Comimos en las mesas de un cafe que ya habia cerrado, con cierto temor a la posibilidad de un guardia enfurecido, y con la sorpresa de que el conversador ahora tenia cara y voz.

Yo la pase muy bien. Fue una velada rara, una pequen~a aventura. Caminata erratica por Mockingbird con Arely, el descubrimiento de una largartija tejana, dos cruces de calle ilicitos, cena furtiva a la una de la man~ana... de comida chatarra... y platicas raras sobre religion... Despues de todo esto agradezco que mi amigo tenga un gusto por las occurrencias extran~as de la gente.

Asi que ahi esta mi ejemplo de los detalles raros, simples, espontaneos de la vida, que la hacen tan unica y grandiosa. Los amigos.